Society and Human Rights: ‘Cheers To A Better Future For Humanity’ by Sola Soyele.

This article was inspired by and is thus dedicated to Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie.

     So, we know of how men squeeze themselves into small and frustrating cages. We might have heard this brutally ignorant statement being drilled into the ears of a bitter young man who had just been unfortunate: You are a man; you shouldn’t cry. This is to uphold a sad criterion of manliness as if to say it isn’t human for any man to cry; as if every man has to have a special ability that makes them emotionally stronger than women. So, ‘sheer’ being a man has become a sufficient reason to be remarkably unyielding to some normal human emotions. David Schmitt of Psychology today reiterated that: …even if sex differences have neurological substrates, gender role socialization may change the brains of boys and girls.

If today men are strong enough to calm their tendencies to cry, it's largely because the society has taught them to. Now, this is not to say that this 'principle of not crying when you really want to' is absolutely bad. However, if the act of teaching men to tame their grief so well that they at least don't cry has made them in any way better humans, who react better enough to situations as these, then I find a failure on the part of the society. I hold the society unfair for not equipping women to tame their tears (when required) from childhood too. Meanwhile, who is the society?

Likewise, it's quite a popular knowledge that ladies and young girls are perceived to twist themselves into certain forms -so as to be attractive, I believe. Perhaps this is to enable them find suitors. Consequently, you hear: Jane is such a dirty person, and she's a woman! How could a woman be so dirty? This paints a picture where a lady is not expected to be dirty or less self-conscious simply because she's a lady, and not because she's a human being. 

For this reason, it is somewhat pardonable at least in a way, that a man could be quite not-so-clean. And so, you see a young man, Michael, walk in public with his hair so unkempt, his no-longer-brown-coloured shirt is apparently more of the burnt-chocolate colour, some flabby flip-flops on his legs and so forth. Note, Michael is not dressed this way because he doesn't have clothes or some nice, informal footwear. It's simply because he believes that it wouldn't be counted as a very serious matter since he's a man. 

Undoubtedly, the purpose of this is not to insult any man for caring less about their looks or cleanliness, since some ladies also do. The essence of this is that: If the society can particularly train the females to take self-care very importantly, then, I consider the society faulty to handle young boys differently, as if they should not also look good. I ask again, who is the society?

This write up does not confront 'twisted or caged' people. Rather, it challenges our society to recognize the equal humanness of both male and female. If gender is a reason a lady is particularly cultured to be polite and respectful, then why can't it be made a human 'thing' to learn how to be polite and respectful? Don't we all deserve some respect? A child should be trained to be respectful and polite because they are human, and every other human being deserves their respect. No one should be trained to respect others at the detriment of their own respect. 

Humanity is a gender mutuality that should be emphasized. If today more ladies are appealingly clean and well-groomed because the society had a role to play in teaching them to, then men are entitled to the same sort of upbringing as humans. We can all be clean and respectful, neatly-groomed and polite to one another -regardless of what gender. In the same light we can and should all be given equal access to life teachings that will help us live better lives -not because of gender, but because of our humanity. Again I ask, 'Who is the society?'

PS: Understanding that your companion is human is essential to a good relationship. She’s not just a woman who should be neat; he’s not just a man who should be strong. They are humans who should be anything human that is good, or better still, positive. Reconsider your unfair expectations today. Cheers to a better future for humanity!